then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
