two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
