Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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