She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Randomize
