i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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