Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
