My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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