I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
it glows. i had to have it.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize
