When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
