the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Randomize
