i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
