areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
