I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
