i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
