she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
