PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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