I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
