he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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