this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
