And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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