hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize