We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
