i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
