i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
