got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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