after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
