Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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