Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
