I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Say something about gay babies.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
