dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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