stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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