another moral hangover. fuck.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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