so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
My cat gives me a boner
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I party with great urgency now.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
