Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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