Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
