I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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