your parents love me but you hate me
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
