Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
