Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
