im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
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