he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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