If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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