I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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