Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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