is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Watching her eat just hurts me
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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