you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
