You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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