TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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