Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
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