you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
